David Brooks recaps the third debate.

Kerry: Bob, as you know, this nation is on the brink of an apocalyptic catastrophe. Civilization as we know it is hanging on by a thread. Our culture has collapsed, our economy is in tatters, the human spirit is extinguished, children never laugh, God is dead, and families like Dick Cheney's are ashamed of their daughters, one of whom is a lesbian. All of this is because of George Bush.

Did you know that right here in Arizona the average share of the national debt on a per capita basis is rising faster than the inverse of the median lost wages ratio of the typical swing voter in Ohio, Missouri and Florida combined?

People in small towns across the country turn a very minor problem into something ridiculously major.

"It's a day for the good Lord, not for the devil," said Barbara Braswell, who plans to send her 4-year-old granddaughter Maliyah out trick-or-treating in a princess costume on Saturday instead.

"You just don't do it on Sunday," said Sandra Hulsey of Greenville, Ga. "That's Christ's day. You go to church on Sunday, you don't go out and celebrate the devil. That'll confuse a child."

Adam Nagourney's fake blog.

Debate Bests!
(Part II)

Bush:

Best recently-learned word: "Littany."

Best catch-phrase: A tie! "Freedom is on the march" (3 times) and "out of the mainstream" (2 times).

Best epistemology: "Activist judges are actually defining the definition of marriage."

Best silly lie: "The best way to protect citizens from guns is to prosecute those who commit crimes using guns." (Come on, does the NRA even believe that?)

Best overall line: "Gosh, I don't think I ever said 'I'm not worried about Osama bin Laden.' That's kinda one of those... 'exaggerations.'"

Kerry:

Best liberal-turn-off: "We're all God's children." (Gag me.)

Best reference to one's mother: "Integrity, integrity, integrity."

Best overall line: "The president just said that federally-funded healthcare leads to poor results. Perhaps that's why he hasn't fully funded the VA." Score!

I'd call this one slight Kerry. He wasn't as strong as I'd hoped or expected, given tonight's subject and the candidates' performance in the first debate, but I think he was strong enough. And he clearly closed better than Bush did. $10 says we see at least two national polls in the next three to four days putting Kerry on top.

(Boston for the weekend, so expect scant posting.)

CNN.com headline: Sacramento nixes sex on fire engines.

In a major victory in the War on Terror, Congress on Monday passed a "$9 million tax reduction on bows and arrows." Also included in the bill: "$27 million in tax breaks on gambling income of foreigners at American horse-racing and dog-racing tracks." Take that, al Qaeda!

Tennessee Democrats devise a really retarded campaign slogan.

Democrats in a race for a state House seat in District 82, are circulating a flyer that shows a retarded child with President Bush’s face running in a track race. The headline says: "Voting for Bush Is Like Running In The Special Olympics: Even If You Win, You’re Still Retarded."

Does anyone else think it's a strange choice on McGreevey's part to join a law firm with the word "Weiner" in its name?

Election problems in Florida? Pshaw!

A public test of Palm Beach County's electronic voting machines was postponed because a computer server crashed.

John Edwards on Leno last night:

Leno: You know, President Bush, he also runs. Now, he says he runs 5 or 6 miles every day.
Edwards: Yeah.
Leno: 5K race, who would win?
Edwards: Well, you know, I run, and I... I played a little football back when I was in school. And the president, I think, was there at those football games, too. He was on the side, maybe, with his pom-poms. I'm not sure, how fast can you run in a cheerleader outfit?

Tom Coburn, already noted for his responsible, tolerant views on social issues of all kinds, keeps the hits coming:

"You know, Josh Burkeen is our rep down here in the southeast area... He was telling me lesbianism is so rampant in some of the schools in southeast Oklahoma that they'll only let one girl go to the bathroom. Now think about it. Think about that issue. How is it that that's happened to us."

The world's craziest presidential candidate takes time off the stump to argue that, contrary to popular belief, he's actually completely in touch with American values:

But if each camp charges the other with being outside the mainstream, who's left inside it? Such rhetoric is "a logical fallacy," says Michael Peroutka, running for president in 38 states on the Constitution Party ticket. With a platform that pledges to abolish the Education Department, prohibit women in the military, deport all illegal immigrants and base government on the word of God, he hears all the time that he's the one out of the mainstream.

"We are right in harmony with the founding principles of America," Peroutka says. Bush and Kerry "both are members of Skull and Bones, both are committed to an internationalist agenda and a new world order, issues that are really antithetical to the American view of constitutional principles. Why am I the one on the fringe?"